social...ism

i haven't been here in ages.. but for some reason i feel compelled to re-start my blog (probably the 16th such iteration). today's been a busy day at work... somehow, sitting here, staring at my screen, and writing reports, reading news, watching market numbers flash green or red, even my beloved excel sheets - all that seems so vain. but then as i'm taking my 15 minutes of freedom to write, staring at my monitors, i don't have that same sinking feeling as i do when i'm writing/reading finance stuff... odd.

2 interesting people lately have impacted me - altho in different ways.

i'm pretty much done with this book on barack obama, called the audacity of hope. for those that live under a rock (or on the other side of the harbor), he's currently embattled in a heated contest for the democratic presidential nomination against hillary clinton. the guy is a very thoughtful man, if not idealistic - and although i've never really been partial to that kind of person when thinking about THE PRESIDENCY of the us&a, i have to say that he displays quite the potential to be a good one if (and that's a BIG if) he can actually pull of half of what he proposes. actually, he doesn't propose much - and that is where hillary has him down. he talks a fantastic talk, delivers well, and speaks a language the people can understand, and maybe even speaks what the people want to the hear. but what's wrong with hope for a better america? what's wrong with striving to provide a form of 'universal' healthcare? what's wrong with policy to support marriage relationships and stable households? education? PEACE? MORALS & ETHICS? i can't think of a better platform than that - because if all i have to look forward to is a paycheck at the end of the month, hoping to someone that i can put enough away so that when i'm old and gray i'll have enough to keep a home, to see a doctor, to eat a nice meal once in a while, to call my grandkids, etc (generally the average american these days) - then that totally SUCKS! i'm glad obama is running, and putting out the awareness that someone that isn't the heir to the world's ketchup factory, the son of a son of oil barons, the family of questionable business ethics and morals, movie stars... that just a plain joe schmoe (who also happens to be black), that lived the american dream, that worked his butt off to make things right, that believes in GOD ALMIGHTY, and most importantly, that also has the same concerns as he is preaching out, that this is a person with the brains, smarts, and same vested interest as me, may well be running the country. i think that's totally radical...

jackie pullinger is also totally radical. i know absolutely nothing about her, except from what i've heard from other people. but i was essentially forced to go see her last week at the vine, where she conducted a 3 session 'seminar' on god's heart for the poor. powerful indeed! and i'm extremely glad i went. not sure what it is - but reading obama's book (above) has really gotten me to think about society as a whole. listening to jackie is a great complement, because she will make you take action against those convictions. like all superstar christian folk, it was difficult to actually have a conversation with her, not because she's stand-off-ish, but because she's constantly mobbed by people. so - i didn't wanna add to the mob... i'm not even sure what i woulda gotten out of a conversation with her that i already got out of listening to her talk. actually - it wasn't even the teaching that struck me - it was her stubborn focus, integrity and passion that caught me. she could actually have talked about knitting or cooking, and i woulda had the same effect. BUT, she talked about the poor, the lost, the addicts - the underpriveleged that in reading obama's book, i had felt that while government can do their bit, the people have to be moved in order for real change to happen. so i'm challenged by that - because if i call myself a child of God, if i worship with the true intensity reflected in the lyrics of the songs rather than the music, then the path really is to effect that change around me - as jackie said, with compassion for those that are underpriveleged, one at a time.

so i hope that the lessons stay, and become ingrained in my person. there is no greater blessing that i could imagine in my life as i have now - wife, home, job, daughter-on-the-way. i make no excuses for those blessings, but rather i accept them. i know that i've worked my butt off to get to this stage in life - sacrificed the fun for study, capitalizing on the great gift of education from my parents, and giving up my early years of post-college life celebration for long nights of work. knowing God has put that all into perspective. peter parker summed up the parable of tenants the best: "with great power comes great responsibility".

i fear complacency the most. it's easy to get lost in that - after years of toil and trouble (as we are cursed forever following the exile from eden), and finally settling down and seemingly having an opportunity to 'relax' a bit, i want to just hit cruise control and kick back and sip mango smoothies. i barely was able to get that straw into my mouth, when this pullinger lady comes to my church, and tells me to get off my couch, and turn my abstract intangible compassion, into real and physical action. i won't do it out of pity or guilt - that would be just plain wrong (and pointless); in fact, i don't have an ounce of pity. guilt - well, that remains to be seen. but i want to do it because a refugee in the church laid his hand on my shoulder and prayed over me, that i can have scales removed from my eyes, that i would be able to see with the compassion that God has for his people. that was heart-wrenching. that made me realize that although i have everything i could ever have imagined, it was actually nothing if i have not God's love.

then i looked on all the works that my hands had done,
and on the labor in which i had toiled;
and indeed all was vanity and grasping for the wind.
There was no profit under the sun
eccl 2:11

last thing jackie said that impacted me: if i want to have the fullness of God's blessings, i'll need to empty myself of all that is me, so that when i have nothing left, God can replenish that with the fullness of His Spirit. wow... that's a lot of dumping that needs to be done then...